Abortion, Abortion, Wherefore Art Thou, Abortion?

The Onion does it again.

Planned Parenthood Opens $8 Billion Abortionplex

Their articles are usually over-the-top; this one, even more so than usual. However, the writer captures a number of statements pro-lifers believe about women.

The abundance of surgical space, Richards said, will ensure that women visiting the facility can be quickly fitted into stirrups without pausing to second-guess their decision or consider alternatives such as adoption. Hundreds of on-site counselors are also available to meet with clients free of charge and go over the many ways that carrying a child to term will burden them and very likely ruin their lives.

 “We really want abortion to become a regular part of women’s lives, especially younger women who have enough fertile years ahead of them to potentially have dozens of abortions,” said Richards, adding that the Abortionplex would provide shuttle service to and from most residences, schools, and shopping malls in the region. “Our hope is for this facility to become a regular destination where a woman in her second trimester can whoop it up at karaoke and then kick back while we vacuum out the contents of her cervix.”

Nineteen-year-old Marcy Kolrath, one of the Abortionplex’s first clients, told reporters that despite her initial hesitancy, she was quickly put at ease by staff members who reassured her that she could have abortions over and over for the next decade before finally committing to motherhood. Kolrath also said she was “wowed” by the facility’s many attractions. 

Yes, this is satire, and these quotes are all made up. Nevertheless, the underlying premise–that women have abortions on impulse, on a whim, for no reason at all–is one that pro-lifers actually believe. This is behind the passage of the many abortion bills demanding ultrasounds and waiting periods before a legal procedure can be performed.

Basically, the anti-abortion, anti-women’s-rights crowd thinks women are too stupid to know they’re pregnant, and too amoral to decide they don’t want to be and exercise their constitutional rights. In other words, they must be protected from themselves.

These people (usually white and male) sure have a high opinion of women, don’t they?

They also have a high opinion of the fantasy world they live in, as evidenced by this page proving some people’s belief that the Abortionplex actually exists.

What can you do about people who don’t live in the real, factual, empirical world? Who fervently believe the patent falsehoods “Barack Obama was born in Kenya” and “Tax cuts for the rich equals job creation” and “Planned Parenthood spends 90% of their money for abortions”? Who are unswayed by scientific studies and research proving their opinions, statements and spins to be untrue?

I don’t know what you can do, other than laugh at them and making damn sure they stay out of office.

Unfortunately, the American people abandoned that responsibility in the 2010 elections, and now we are paying for it.

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One thought on “Abortion, Abortion, Wherefore Art Thou, Abortion?

  1. Most pro-lifers are women. Men want abortion legal more than women so they don’t have to pay child support when they impregnate someone.

    I knew someone who wanted an abortion because she was going on vacation in a few months and wanted to look good in her bikini. How sad…

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